Jeers on Jazeera for Rio as fans lash out

FAN-TASTIC ... England's 3,000 travelling fans were in good voice in San Marino

TWENTY years ago it was a goal after just eight seconds from San Marino’s David Gualtieri.

Last night it was a rather different eight.

Eight tremendous goals and no banana-skin. Not even the merest whiff of the sort of embarrassment England suffered back in 1993.

By half-time it was 5-0 and 3,000 England fans were chanting: “Rio Ferdinand, we know what you are.”

Then the chants became unprintable though the Manchester United defender would, no doubt, have been able to detect them in the Doha studio where he was acting as a pundit for Al Jazeera TV.

As for the missing Ferdinand, well, we’ll wait until Tuesday’s more pressing engagement in Podgorica before drawing any final conclusion.

The England fans, though, made it clear what they thought of Ferdinand pulling
out of the two World Cup qualifiers on the grounds he had to protect his back for United’s title run-in — even though they are 15 points clear at the top.

Their enduring loyalty is with players like Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard, last night’s skipper with the Liverpool captain rested.

The bottom line is Ferdinand has made his own bed and now must lie in it.

Mind you, England could have played without ANY centre-halves, so rarely did San Marino threaten.

In the entire 90 minutes, they hardly got over the halfway line.

Then again they do only have one full-time professional.

It all went very much according to plan with none of the anxiety and missed
heartbeats England fans suffered in Barcelona under Steve McClaren when his
side went in at half-time drawing 0-0 with Andorra.

It certainly went very much the way San Marino boss Giampaolo Mazza had anticipated.

Mazza, who has been San Marino coach for 15 years, had said: “Losing 5-0 is a victory when we play teams like England or Holland because in our heads we are expecting to lose.”

Following that line of thought, San Marino were actually winning at half-time!

It was encouraging to see the England players taking their chances and warming up so well for Tuesday’s pivotal match against group leaders Montenegro, who just edged past Moldova in Chisinau last night with the only goal of the game 12 minutes from time.

Hodgson’s side made their obvious superiority count and were warmly received by the travelling fans in a picturesque ground with floodlights picking out the medieval castle of Serravalle.

San Marino, sadly for the locals, were as bad as all the pre-publicity suggested.
This was a team ranked 207th and equal bottom in the FIFA standings along with Bhutan and the Turks and Caicos Islands.

A team that had now somehow managed to lose their last FIFTY-ONE games since their only ever victory over Liechtenstein (1-0) in 2004.

A team that hasn’t scored in 25 competitive matches since skipper Andy Silva
netted against Slovakia in a 3-1 defeat in 2008.

A team that, since 2006, had been beaten at home by Germany (13-0),
Montenegro (6-0) and Holland and Switzerland (both 5-0). On the road it had been even worse — Holland (11-0), Poland (10-0), Finland (8-0) and the Czech
Republic and Slovakia (both 7-0).

As for club football, San Marino champions Tre Penne had been thrashed 11-0 on aggregate by Luxembourg’s F91 Dudelanja in the first qualifying round of this season’s Champions League. It can’t get much worse than that.

This then is what England were up against as they arrived at the quaint, tree-lined, Stadio Olimpico. Welcome to the wonderful world of modern-day Ruritania.

I had been here back in 1993 but for many of the England fans it was their first visit to the smallest republic in the world.

The flags revealed they were the usual suspects from Rotherham, Barnsley,
Scunthorpe, Leicester, Nottingham Forest, Macclesfield and even non-league Hastings.

The fans, filling their glasses and enjoying the sunshine down the road in Rimini, were looking for Rooney and Co to fill their boots.

It was one-way traffic from the start with five early corners and Alex Oxlade-
Chamberlain hitting the bar in the 10th minute.

But it was San Marino bank clerk Alessandro Della Valle who fittingly opened
England’s account two minutes later, deflected in a low Leighton Baines cross.

We sat back and waited for the ensuing goal avalanche as England peppered Aldo Simoncini’s goal.

It was handy he was an accountant and good at figures as the goals came in a flourish.

Oxlade-Chamberlain, Jermain Defoe, Ashley Young’s cracker and Lampard on his 95th England appearance made it 5-0 by half-time to put fans in a party mood.

A lovely Wayne Rooney free-kick made it six, Daniel Sturridge grabbed No 7 before Defoe completed the rout for the joint biggest England win in a quarter of a century.

Now the England fans were chanting: “Rio, Rio, what’s the score?”

All in all it was an excellent night’s work. Now, though, for the big one.